The Way to a Man's heart is through his stomach !

THE WAY TO A MAN’s HEART IS THROUGH HIS STOMACH 

Author:   Gurmeet Sethi

The first book I presented to my wife after our marriage was a book on cookery by Tarla Dalal. As a new enthusiastic  Army wife, she went about setting  up our temporary home in an accommodation that was devoid of furniture and cooking utensils. She soon learnt to make the most of what we had. A heater to cook ,  a multi-purpose frying pan and a few other items. While I was away to work, training and exercises she would delightfully experiment and produce wonders . I would get hot food once back home. A sheer luxury ever since my bachelor days!

Today, we are retired and live in our permanent home with all comforts. Children happily married and leading their own professional lives , away from us. But, the art of experimenting with food ever since has got better and better.

I got up early at 3 am to write this article. As, I was so impressed over the last night’s simple dinner so tastefully served, comprising white rice and Thai green  fish curry giving  a rich aroma of coconut milk . I must think of a way to express my gratitude and compliment her, I thought . Hence this piece of flattery!

Today, she is an amazing cook, who can produce wonders in a jiffy. At times gives a complex to her kitty friends. She loves to cook, adores her kitchen . Mulls over recipe books, you tube videos and cookery shows. An addict – No, but , passion –Yes!  Her open kitchen is always spick and span and a place of pride !

I have often wondered at the secret of our blissful married life of over 40 years. My mind goes back to what I had scribbled on the cover page of the gift book presented to her. It read, “ The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach!”

I think many a newly wed couple, need to take a leaf or two out of this. Its so important to keep the homes fire burning as much as you may initially adore to eat out. We too did and still do ! We perhaps  explored every other food joint wherever we got posted. As I look around to find every other marriage on the rocks, divorced couples increasing by the day, I am all the more convinced that the secret to a successful marriage is not just through the bedroom !

Changing life styles of working couples, has increased dependency on eating out every other day. Fast food outlets, Swiggy and Zomato have aggravated the situation leading to a thaw in relationships.

The sparkle and  glint of pride that I get to see in my wife's eyes , when she surprises me with a new recipe is far greater than that of a working woman who has cracked the code.

The Dining Table is still the sacred place at home, where one learnt all one’s manners and table etiquettes. A place that knit the family together. A place where topics of common interest are discussed. It  is also an extension of the kitchen where a woman’s writ runs large. It is still a place that children miss even after creating an empty nest!

Another aspect that I strongly believe is the Kitchen Economics that has led to considerably impacting Home budgeting. The difference in life styles was all the more glaring in a campus where everyone earned more or less equal and had similar roles. Where else can you get Tax Free savings !The house wife made the difference ! My good old CO would always say , “ Gentlemen , Your better half can either be an asset or a liability-choose carefully!”

I have always admired the kitchen management of such women. They are born managers, without having been through the jargons of expensive B-school education. They have a finger over the pulse, starting from  inventory management to waste management. They shall amaze you with their hospitality in front of your friends. These are homes  that attract guests and fiends, foster and nurture family ties, build long lasting relationships and bind children to their families.

Every day, to office in my second innings, my colleagues still ask for a bite, each time I open my home cooked Tiffin ! I am fortunate that both my daughter and daughter in law , who are richly qualified working professionals follow these simple ideals !

 May this be a compliment to all such women who understand this little secret to a blissful  matrimonial life.May they keep the home fires burning !